Aligning With Gifts . . . for Success

I am convinced that when a person is using their real gifts, they make things that are hard . . . look easy. This is just the opposite of what happens when I play guitar.

To be fair . . . I have a lot of technical skill with a guitar . . . but playing guitar, and creating music in general, is not one of my gifts. I work hard to produce a good sound with my Taylor 613ce . . . something other musician’s appear to do easily, but . . . for me . . . is a lot of work. One night, I was struggling with a particular section of Eric Clapton’s classic Tears in Heaven—a piece that I eventually would master . . . after months and months of work. I asked my son, who has his mother’s gift for music, if he could help me with figuring out a particularly difficult section. “Sure,” he replied. “I’ll look at it.” The next day—the next day!— he came back playing the entire piece. “I’m not talking to you anymore!” I joked. In truth, I’m used to it. All my kids (6 in number) excel at things that are not my gifts—like art, writing, drama, etc.

When my son plays guitar, unlike his father, people pull out their phones and start taking pictures; or they ask me, “Is he left-handed?” (He’s not.) It is definitely something that comes much easier for him than it does for me. Fortunately, my son doesn’t see this particular gift as something that sets him apart, and above, others. “Talent is as common as table salt,” he quotes . . . when others admire his gift . . . and he’s right. Everyone is gifted.

Gifts and Making It Look Easy

Gifts are what people can do easily. While I can’t master a challenging guitar piece without a crazy amount of work. I can read a room of people—even a room full of strangers—with a high degree of reliability. I see patterns I understand behavior. My family has forbid me, due to my ability to recognize patterns, from telling them what is coming in a movie, play, or television show . . . but I almost always know. While having a Ph.D. in human development enhanced this ability, the truth is, I have always been able to do it easily . . . and I can’t even tell you how I “know” except that I pick up on patterns and nuances of non-verbal and verbal cues. Oh, I’m also “on to” the patterns that writers and producers use to throw you off . . . so the viewer won’t predict what is coming. All my family members have such gifts. Things they can do easily that the “old man” can’t do well. Whether it’s grammar, spelling, music, art, theatre . . . truly talent and gifts are “common.”

If you want to learn to play guitar . . . hire my son. Want an editor, an artist, a recommendation for choreography? I can’t point to the kids in my family that have these gifts. You don’t want to hire me to teach you guitar—someone who has learned a lot of technique bur is limited in this area—lest you curtail your own development. Could I teach a beginner? Sure. But if they are gifted in music, I would need to pass them on to someone else very quickly to avoid delaying their development. The same goes for the other areas I mentioned that are not my gifts. In the same way, hiring people for their gifts will make hitting your targets more likely. I see leaders hiring business, finance, marketing, or other coaches then asking them about how to manage people. Maybe that’s okay if this is an area of gifting but most of the time I’d like them to work with someone whose talent and expertise is in human systems.

Giftedness . . . in Coaching/Consulting

This is why I beat the drum for leaders to hire “people-people” when it comes to improving their organizational culture. And the reason why we have spent a lot of time training graduate students and professionals in the mental health sciences to work with organizations and businesses.** Because a lot of business consultants have developed a techniques and tools for helping but, if they are not working in an area of gifts, their outcomes are likely to be poor over time. Poor simply because they are not working in an area of gifting and the things that come easily to others are not their strengths. (For a real-life example, see our post Consultant, Stay in Bounds! In this post we tell the all-too-familiar story of a consultant asked to work outside their area of gifting and the traumatic consequences on an organization). If interested, you can also check out a related post on why Consultants and Clients Shouldn’t be Friends or how Steve Jobs used his talents at Apple.)

Using Your Gifts

So, if you are a coach or consultant, make sure you are practicing within your area of giftedness. (Keep it simple. Focus on your core services.) Don’t let your own ambition, other people’s vision for your career, or the pressure of the organization or leader’s needs make you operate outside your “sweet spot.” Refer to someone whose gifts align with the needs. Hopefully, they in return, will do the same and refer to you the organizations and leaders that you can help with your gifts. Everyone “wins” and success is more likely. Also, be intentional about continuing to develop your gifts. Invest in training, coaching, and other self-development activities to enhance, expand, and deepen your gift. This will continue to make the value you can provide to organizations or leaders increase over time. It will also help to “fill the pipeline” of work and bring you more opportunities.

Hiring for Gifts

If you are an organizational leader, hire a coach or consultant for their specific gifts and do not let them—or let yourself—expect them to work outside their area of expertise. This particularly is a risk over time. A trusted advisor, who has helped in the past, is asked to work on something new. The focus is on the trust. But is this the right person, with the right gifts, for this particular problem or task? Rarely, is this the focus. The leader and coach/consultant simply assume they can tackle a new “problem” . . . and perhaps they can, but at what cost to efficiency and with what degree of risk? Smart leaders find the right tool for the job and smart leaders/consultants find the right set of gifts to maximize success.

In our next post we will offer tips for choosing consultants/coaches that have the people-gift and that are prepared to handle organizational issues.

** Even professionals in the people area need training and identifying their gifts. All “people-people” are not gifted in the same way either. Some are great at analytical thought, statistics, but not good at people skills. Others are great with people but struggle to use the analytical tools to help leaders. Some may be great at strategic planning and poor at conflict resolution. Others may be great at personnel issues but not good at visioning. It all depends on how they are gifted.